


Peanut Butter Jelly Time

by CloakedSparrow



Series: Collected Bat-Family Stories [25]
Category: Batgirl (Comics), Batman (Comics), DCU (Comics), Detective Comics (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Red Robin (Comics)
Genre: Bat Family, Family Fluff, Gen, No Dialogue, No Romance, No Smut, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-27
Updated: 2017-12-27
Packaged: 2019-02-22 12:08:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13166616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloakedSparrow/pseuds/CloakedSparrow
Summary: How each member of the Bat Family makes a PB&J.





	Peanut Butter Jelly Time

**Author's Note:**

> Just something short and sweet to make up for the last story. Still not making any promises regarding editing.

Alfred makes the best PB&J. 

He always puts the perfect amount of peanut butter and the perfect amount of jam in them. They are never too dry or too wet. The filling always stays in between the bread. The diner is never left sticky.   
Alfred knows exactly how each member of the family prefers theirs to be prepared, whether they take the time to prepare them that way themselves or not. 

Despite this, Alfred has actually never eaten a PB&J.

Bruce has never made a PB&J. 

He’s eaten plenty. The perfect ones made by Alfred. The overfilled ones made by Dick. The double decker ones made by Jason. The messy ones made by Cassandra. The just-this-side-of-too-light ones made by Tim. The crust-less ones made by Duke. He’s even had Damian slam a sandwich laden plate on the desk next to him before commenting that he isn’t a servant and walking away.

He likes them all. Its just never occurred to him to make one whenever he’s hungry.

Dick has made plenty of PB&Js.

He makes them overstuffed, to the point where the others don’t know how he manages to eat them without making a mess of himself (Bruce and Tim have both used forks and knives to eat them when he’s made them one). He usually eats it standing at the counter where he made it. If he’s still hungry, he makes another. Once he’s full, he puts everything away and cleans up. 

Alfred used to try to get him to sit down, but too many times he’s seen Bruce sit down to eat, only to see the Bat Signal and take off without getting in a bite. He wants to make sure he gets the chance to eat as much as possible if he has to take off. 

Jason has made less PB&Js than Dick but still made his fair share.

He makes them double decker, using both crunchy and creamy peanut butter when available. Sometimes he even makes an additional layer and no one is sure how he fits them in his mouth. He eats his sandwich at the table, savoring every bite. Then he cleans up and puts everything away. 

He has had to bail on his sandwich at times. When he returns, as long as there isn’t any sign of insects or mold, he finishes the sandwich. If he’s at the manor, Alfred always puts the sandwich away for him so its still fresh when he finishes it. 

Cassandra occasionally makes herself PB&Js.

Its always plural. Sometimes two, sometimes three. She uses a different jam in each sandwich when she can because she likes to try everything. She then packs them up and cleans up after herself (she doesn’t put a lot of care into making them, so her clean up is usually a bit longer than the boys) before taking her sandwiches with her to train or patrol or work on her reading. Sometimes she eats them all at once, sometimes she eats them over the course of a few hours. 

She always finishes them though. She doesn’t care if the bread gets a little stale. 

Tim makes PB&J sometimes. 

Usually, he makes them when he’s waited too long to eat and is too hungry or busy to make anything more time consuming. He always makes his sandwich on a plate and cuts it in half. Once finished, he sets the plated sandwich aside and cleans up. Then he takes the sandwich to his desk or the Bat Computer and eats it while he’s working. He’s concerned about messing up his or Bruce’s computer, so he tends to put less peanut butter and jam in them just to make sure they don’t spill out. 

He has, on occasion, gotten too invested in his work and completely forgotten about the sandwich. That’s why he cuts them in half. He’s more likely to hold half of it in his hand and then actually eat it. Alfred was the one to figure that out.

Duke has also made plenty of PB&Js. 

He starts by spreading peanut butter on one slice of bread, adding a strip of jelly to the center and then rolling it up and stuffing the whole thing in his mouth. Then he makes a regular sandwich, cuts the crust off like his mother used to, cleans up, and sits down to eat his sandwich. He says the half sandwich at the start allows him to take his time enjoying the other one and makes it just the right amount of PB&J. Despite his unusual method, he never gets jam on himself or the counter. 

Everyone agrees he makes the closest PB&J to Alfred’s. He’s offered to teach Damain, who he’s spotted trying to spy on Alfred when making his, but the boy’s pride won’t let him accept. 

Damain has only made a few PB&Js.

He always puts the peanut butter on the left bread and the jelly on the right one. Sometimes he removes the crust, sometimes he doesn’t. It depends on the bread. He used to take his sandwich and leave at that point, but Dick and Alfred put a stop to that. Now, he cleans up before he leaves if he’s taking the sandwich somewhere. Otherwise, he eats at the table and then cleans up. 

He doesn’t fill them as much as Dick or as lightly as Tim, but he hasn’t got the filling quite as perfect as Alfred. He’s been told he never will but that it doesn’t matter. He still watches Alfred out of the corner of his eye whenever he sees the kind man making one.


End file.
